I opened my BBC news app to see the headline “BBC News: New Zealand ‘cat burglar’ caught stealing men’s underwear“. It immediately reminded me of our departed cat, Peter, and his penchant for stealing my bras and underwear. He applied his unappreciated and illicit creativity by chewing, kneading, and shedding onto the items into a drewly nest of lingerie deep underneath Jamie’s bed when we first were dating.

It took some courage and diplomacy to broach the subject with Jamie about his panty raiding, that I assumed was a fetish, but chance saved me from the conversation. As luck prevailed and Peter stole my underwear in my sight. His fluffy well endowed ass flattened to the floor as he shimmied under the bed with my bra and I beheld his creation shortly after in disgust.

It’s a fond memory that’s been retold and there’s many like them that I ache to share here about the kids but I don’t want to cause them, undoubtedly, extreme embarrassment and anger at my pushing of the “over share” limits. I’ll just use those as blackmail for their adolescence. Besides, I still can’t figure out which kid is stealing my socks.